Today my husband and I celebrate our 29th year wedding anniversary and I have learned that even though there are some do’s and don’ts in marriage, there are no manuals on the right or wrong way to make your marriage work. Marriage is not a “one size fits all” type of relationship and sometimes we have to “break them in” before they finally fit. As children growing up, especially before the 90’s, our relationships were expected to evolve in a certain manner. First the expectation was love and dating, followed by marriage, babies, happily ever after and a million other cliches in between. The reality is, in today’s society life rarely follows that script and as a firm believer in God I’ll say that’s alright. He knows our hearts and loves us anyway.
When my husband and I first got married we didn’t know what to expect. We soon found out that marriage was much like swimming and with every passing day we were drifting further and further into the deep end. There were days when the mere weight of the responsibilities of marriage and family life became so overwhelming, we sometimes felt as though we were drowning and the maneuvering and routines to stay afloat were a daily challenge. Marriage is a team sport and if you can master the art of synchronized swimming, even better. We also had to quickly understand that it was perfectly okay being imperfect. Love is imperfect, and so is life. We are flawed human beings and the quicker we realized and accepted that, the happier our lives became. With the years came familiarity, lessons, clarity, deeper love and understanding.
So, today we celebrate 29 years, and great ones I might add. We have literally stood by each other through better and worse, richer and poorer, sickness and health and we totally accept that death too is a part of the cycle of life. But now we focus on living as we patiently look forward to our golden years and continuing to keep our heads above water.